Sunday, July 30, 2017

Update - My Scribbles

The Wonderings of Jack Coving: 
The Mathemagician Politician

I'll bet that you weren't expecting to see me again so soon. 'Jack has returned for a brief spell, only to disappear back into the woodwork...' Who could blame you for thinking as much? I did abandon you beautiful people for a stint. However, our new leader has stirred inspiration and the moans and groans cannot remain quelled. So, I invite you now to get in close and join me in this bottle of fine American bourbon as we dip into my wondrings...

haven't I been telling ye all about Leo, though? he hasn't a notion, not a single clue. Jack may be gruff and somewhat coarse but my God, can I call it.

With each public appearance, dear Leo gives us another peek at his self righteous, ignorant, manipulative and down right dumb self and it's become evident that he's in way over his head.

Unfortunately for our glorious ruler, during his last interview, he was up against the legendary Vincent Browne and true to my hero Mr. Browne's probing form, he pulled no punches with ditzy Leo... I know I came at least twice just watching Vincent annihilate our bemused Taoiseach.

The two major issues which I have with our darling leader (two of dozens) is for one, (and this is an important one which the global media is diligently omitting) we, the Irish people, did not elect him. I don't mean that it was a close result or only a small and bitter minority voted against him and his party. No, his party, Fine Gael, did not gain a majority vote in our last general election, in fact, no party did. What should have been a revolution and the demise of the old elitist politics only descended into a farcical charade....Fianna Fail, who constantly argued that they and Fine Gael were completely different parties, jumped aboard the FG ship by agreeing to abstain from any parliamentary vote which would go against FG's agenda. Rather than putting the fate of our country back into the hands of the Irish people and allowing for another election, it was a matter of keep the head down, say nothing and we'll all just go for a pint instead.

The second gripe which I have with our holier-than-thou leader is that he literally cannot comprehend how hard life is for the working class, the elderly, the physically sick, the mentally ill and anyone who requires special needs. How can he? He was born privileged and immersed himself in that pampered world, all the while he refuses to call a spade for what it actually fucking is.

Some may argue that he's merely trying to pull the wool over our eyes, however, I'm genuinely beginning to believe that he is completely oblivious to the struggles which most of us face on a daily basis and made his arrogant perspective perfectly clear on his recent appearance on Tonight with Vincent Browne. 

Bless him, Vincent broke it right down for our trendy Taoiseach in the most simplistic form that he could. It was reminiscent of a first class teacher explaining what 2+2 equals. 

Just to backtrack slightly, When Enda led the country, he was adamant that the average annual income per person in our country was €35000... not bad right? Leo, too, is continuing this mantra, stating that income is rising and inequality is reducing - utter bullshit, was then - is now. How can the average income be €35000 when over half the population earn €9.25 or below per hour? How does less than €20000 come near 35k? Or how can you be expected to stretch your 19k to add up to the 24k they're saying that you need to survive? 

Well Vincent used a nice example to simplify it for him. Bare in mind, this was around the time I needed a pants change, so I'm paraphrasing here... 

A room with four people and each of these people have a different sum of money in their wallets. We'll say €30, €40, €50 and €50000. Mathematically, the average amount of money per person in that room is €12530. However, realistically, the only one hoarding that kind of cash in their pocket is Leo Varadkar. Retired Mrs. Walsh down the road still has only €30, Jack Coving is trying to stretch that €40 and then there's thirty year old Vanessa, who has no hope of getting a mortgage with her €50. You want to average it out Leo? Then split your €50k with those other three. 

Essentially, what people forget, is that there is an inaccuracy with averages and the higher your range, the more vague the average will be. We cannot gauge a true standard of living when the bottom 90% of the population, who earn on average €27000 a year are lumped in with the top 1% who earn, on average, of €350k per year. 

This was where the truth of Leo really shone... His response? He wants to make life better for the middle class. So essentially fuck anyone on welfare, fuck half the population who earn minimum and below and fuck those who earn just above minimum but below the cost of living. That's a hell of a lot of people you intend on fucking Leo, hope you brought enough lube. 

Wait! hold off on those gallons of Vaseline for a sec, he won't be fucking as many as we had initially thought (Just those crooks on welfare it seems) because  - and I'm deadly serious here - he considers the working class (those earning well below the cost of living) to be apart of the middle class! Even political scientists have deemed the statement as 'odd'. Just because you say something, Leo, it doesn't make it so... Call that shit oozing out of your mouth what you like, it doesn't change the fact that it smells like a pungent cesspit. 

The fact is, that, by definition, middle class is considered to be the group of people who fall between the upper and working class. People who can afford a mortgage, insurance, refuse, utilities, Internet, car costs, medical bills, provide for their children and who still have cash left over to save up a nest egg. 

I know it looks "really good" to Europe, a country filled with middle class and I know you only want to fit in with your liberal, cosmopolitan and sexy European counterparts but cut the crap, they will find out eventually that over half of your population fall into the category of 'working class', a class which, sadly, is growing. 

I'm crying out to you all now, the world needs to stop praising this man. Who gives a flying fuck whether or not he's gay? The media absolutely fixated on his sexuality after his 'election' and entirely overlooked the type of politician that he is. He's nothing but a leech, sucking dry the resources for the needy and lavishing it upon his precious middle and upper class. There is nothing, to date, within his bland, uninspiring and short political career which renders him fit or worthy to lead and run our country - his mosts distinguished act thus far saved the health department €12 million, during his run as Minister for Health, by slashing funding from the already pathetic mental health budget of €35 million, stating that the funds could be better used elsewhere. In a country where we rank number Two within Europe for death by suicide and in a country where Apple owe us billions in tax, he found it appropriate to cut our funding for mental health by roughly 30%... and this man is a doctor!... We are dealing with a very simple being here.

For now my friends, I intend on finishing this bottle, before taking a long walk. Don't you love that fresh scented air after a summer shower? 

Until we speak again, 
Take care, 
Jack Coving

More on Leo's stupidity here
The Wonderings of Jack Coving: Democracy - Bolloxracy
You Up Yet Leo?

© Sarah O’Regan

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